No success

I don't write on this blog for months and I don't even know why  and maybe it's for the same reason I don't write on diaries anymore -because I don't need it. But today I do. I don't want to talk to anyone about my issues and problems except to myself. I can't sleep properly, I don't eat properly (spend hours without eating or eat a whole bunch of high calories food). I can't breathe right and I feel like crying and this isn't due to my period. It's really because I'm completely and exhaustively tired. These 4 months were too hard for me. I really can't keep pushing myself that much but there's nothing I can do. Now my german test is coming and I'm going to fail, I'm going to fail my first subject in college and there's nothing I can do to stop it. I don't understand the classes, I despise the teacher... Nothing good on those classes. And it truly makes me sad. I feel like I haven't given the best of me but I really can't do better. My body is aching. The only thing that's left is study for the other exams. Work hard on those, since I'll be home.